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What if my former spouse and I cannot decide on a parenting plan?

03 Feb

An important step in the divorce process is agreeing what to do with your children. This includes decisions about child custody, parenting time, child support, and who holds what responsibilities over the child or children in your life. In the past, there was one custodial parent and the other parent would receive visitation rights only. This is no longer the only option. Nowadays, one parent’s home may be where the children spend most of their time, but there is a clear trend toward more equal-time arrangements. Also, it is very common for parents to have equal decision-making authority regarding such matters as education, non-emergency health care, and religious training.

When the decisions about the parenting plan are complicated or when both parties are unable to reach a resolution, the court may intervene and require a parenting plan evaluation.

In a parenting plan evaluation, a specially-trained and licensed expert evaluates each parent and child to assist the court to make a decision. These experts often have advanced degrees and training regarding child development. The evaluator is an impartial party who is focused on one thing, and that is “the best interests of the children” involved.

What is the goal of a parenting evaluation?

It is key that the expert performing the evaluation be trained in how to remain impartial and keep the well being of the child a priority. Luckily, in Western Washington there is a special certificate program that trains health and law professionals in these skills. It is called the Parenting Evaluation Training Program (PETP) at the University of Washington. Graduates of this program have been specially trained to work effectively as evaluators and treatment personnel to protect the interests of children and help resolve high-conflict family law litigation.

A PETP graduate also may offer “Co-Parent Psychotherapy,” which is a form of counseling with the following goals:

  • Reduce parental conflict and enhance cooperation
  • Quickly resolve disputes between parents about the children
  • Assist child’s (children’s) coping with their parents’ conflict
  • Reduce post-divorce litigation
  • Enhance parenting skills

At its core, the parenting evaluation and co-parent psychotherapy can help you learn how to parent your child together with your former spouse and lead a more peaceful life after divorce. It is not a single-parent parenting class, but an opportunity for both parents to learn how to focus on the well being of their child.

You can find details on what to expect during the University of Washington Co-Parent Psychotherapy process here.

Where can I find a qualified parenting evaluation professional to help me with this issue?

If you need a parenting evaluation or want to start Co-Parenting Psychotherapy, the list of PETP Graduates is a great resource.

If you have any questions about how a parenting evaluation can help move your family law issue forward, we can help. You can sign up for a free 30-minute Attorney Appointment on the web.  We schedule these appointments on one Tuesday each month.  You can also contact our office and speak to Xenia at 877-776-7310 to schedule a free consultation.

We look forward to working with you.

Source: Guidelines for Child Custody Evaluations in Family Law Proceedings (http://www.apa.org/practice/guidelines/child-custody.pdf ) by American Psychological Association
Related: Co-Parent Psychotherapy (http://depts.washington.edu/petp/coparent.html )